Why People Form a Relationship – Some of the Reasons


1. Physical attraction and sex based on appearance (a man’s muscular build, height, some women prefer tall guys, a particular skin color (white, Latino, black), haircut), fancy clothing, a fancy car or an expensive house.

2. Glory by association: if the man is famous, the woman is also in the limelight. If he is notorious, still the woman gets the attention. A famous senator, an actor or an actress, a musician is very popular in society if he/she is good. Most of these have hangers-on — people who follow them wherever they go and are noticed. If you are photographed with Mike Piazza (the baseball star) you will be noticed. This is one example of glory by association. Bob Hope was popular the world over. Most people in show business are social favorites and admired by members of the opposite sex. Just to mention a few:

Liz Taylor, Madonna, Jennifer Lopez, Harrison Ford, Tom Cruise. Bin Laden has terrorized the entire world with suicide bombings and other violent acts. His right- hand men are also in the limelight and thus equally notorious. This is also notoriety by association. A TV personality has many admirers.

3. To avoid loneliness, a very common social disease dreaded by most men and women;

4. To get away from abusive parents;

5. To lead a rich lifestyle – a rich man mostly guarantees a lavish lifestyle and the woman can be the lady of leisure and a socialite helping charities

6. Nurse and purse: if the man needs nursing, the woman nurses him till he drops. She gets security and protection from predators and inherits his money. Quite a good deal and it suits both the parties.

7. To meet someone mentally compatible for intellectual stimulation. If the man is mentally less mature then it is easier to dominate him and use him for company and protection;

8. For spiritual evolution and growth, which is rare, et al.

When you meet someone, remember to consider the following:

1. Legal consequences of all your actions. What are you getting into? Is it his place or yours? What can happen? How safe are you legally and physically. Are you drunk or sober, on some drug (ecstasy, heroin, crack etc.). Mistakes are generally made when a person is not in command of his/her faculties. You can easily (unbeknown to you) pick up an STD ( a sexually transmitted disease) like HIV positive, or worse hepatitis C that has no permanent cure and become a carrier of dangerous germs.

2. Carefully analyze the social orbit the person is in, e.g. find out who the people are close to him or her, whom he or she associates with and social commitment to them. This will have influence on the time the person can devote to you. If you are the center of his or her activity, then their world will revolve around you alone, otherwise not.

3. At which development state the person is: his/her age, knowledge and experiences of life in general, degree of maturity and professional status, in particular. Is the person religious (in the popular sense) or not. Does he or she have a moral code and a code of conduct (reliability, dependability, etc).

4. What are the duties this person must discharge (social, professional, civic, political or religious). If the person is without conscience, the person will not discharge all duties or be negligent and careless even about you.

5. What are the commitments that have been made that must be honored by the person (social, personal, financial and legal).

6. Does the person have any religious beliefs? (is a theist or atheist, has respect for dogmas and ethical conduct). Has the person any real and deep knowledge and path for spiritual progress of the soul’s evolution or is the person existing on a physical plane alone like cattle with total disregard for intellectual and spiritual development and hiding all this in a matter-of-fact manner?

7. The level of existence: how much time and effort the person devotes to physical activity, intellectual and spiritual growth. Where is the focus?

8. Is the person responsible? What are his/her responsibilities in business, society, family or is the person just drifting without any aim or goal in mind, drinking and gambling and taking life easy and casually.

9. What are the social, financial and legal obligations of the person? This is very important and must be known to you. What are the parents’ plans for the future of the girl/boy.

10. The background check for the past 5-10 years. The family ties. If the person keeps quiet about the family, he may be hiding the relationship from friends and family or evading child support.

11. Does the person initiate actions? If not, you will be doing all the work and carrying the can. You will be nursing the lazy bum.

12. Does the person talk about himself or herself? Silence can mean a dark past or a secret.

13. Does the person talk about any future plans frankly and openly? Most people who are easy going, passive or indifferent, just want someone to take care of all their needs at all times. They cling to the person obstinately. Beware of the quiet types. Silent waters run deep.

14. Other factors: level of existence – high or low. Determine the numbers in the life of the person (dominance) he is attracted to. Study your own cycles at the time of first meeting (most important point).

15. Legally the man’s place is most unsafe for a women.

16. The financial situation. Don’t reveal to anyone your savings, social security number, credit cards and where you live (for a woman).

17. The health of the person. Is he active by nature or drinks to motivate himself. Such a person could be an alcoholic.

18. The legal status. Is he or she a U.S. citizen? If not, the person may have a plan to use you to get a legal status in USA.

19. Job history. How long has he been in his job? What are the legal limitations for his stay in this country?

20. Does he or she take drugs or tranquilizers? Drug addicts have mood swings and do, at times, beg, steal or commit even murder to support their habit. This would make your life very unsafe.

21. Is the person too emotional? Emotional people are a slave of their emotions. Emotionally controlled people are most reliable and dependable and have wisdom. Emotional imbalance is most dangerous. Such people are very harmful to those around them and to themselves. Reason and feeling must be balanced to avoid extreme situations and calamities in life.

The human personality

Every person has two personalities: one that he or she shows to the world and the other that is kept a secret from others. “More is concealed than is revealed.”

It requires a very profound knowledge of psychology to understand both. Most people know only the outer one that the person exhibits. People do not have the patience or the time to find the other. It is most difficult to form a long-lasting relationship without understanding the person reasonably well. It is very vital to know the moral values, the physical preferences, the spiritual ideals and the code of conduct. The moral values of both parties must be similar or the relationship will fall apart after the physical attraction wears off. All long relationships must be based on moral or spiritual values. This can be verified by observing people who have been together a long time.

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